Avast. Abaft. And Ahoy. The Moose has taken to the seas as Hetha, my wife, has enetered a boat in the Volvo Ocean Race. It's called Bluemoose, you see, product placement again. It's a virtual boat, but follows the real boats as they sail around the world. You can get your own boat and join in the fun on www.volvooceanracegame.com
I don't like sailing, I get seasick watching Captian Pugwash, but Hetha has sailing in her blood, her granddad was a marine in the Second World War and had a boat. She's chosen Johnny Depp to Captain and whilst he's fending off pirates and whatever the seas can throw at him as he navigates Bluemoose from Singapore to Quindong on the first leg, this landlubber is off to Blackpool to sell his wares. Around the corner from Waterstones in Blackpool, there used to be a priest who sang Irish folk songs whilst knitting. He's probably in the Guinness Book of Records for singing the most songs in an hour, whilst speed knitting. Alongside him were two daughters of the church who were selling religious trinkets and the like. You know the kind of stuff, Rosary beads and luminous statues of the Pope. All very tasteful I'm sure but the thought of waking up to a Flashing Pope Benedict does give you the heaby geabies.Well off to scrub the decks and will tell you if the singing, knitting priest is at his station.